We’ve all been there. In relationships where the dynamics just don’t seem right. Yeah?
When I say ‘relationships’ I mean the connections you have with different people, not necessarily just your romantic interests or partners.
I’ve read a number of books in the past which consider all humans to be masses of energy. This is something I have found really useful in my life and this blog post will explain why.
Ultimately, self-love and raising the level of your vibration go hand in hand. When you make an effort to raise your vibration, you show yourself the love and care you deserve. You’ll feel good and attract good. By taking positive actions and changing your mindset, you’ll manifest greater things. By loving yourself, you’ll live a life you love.Vex King. Good Vibes, Good Life.
Essentially, the first step towards self-love is to acknowledge that your body is made up of energy. We need to understand what environments, events or people alter our energy and in what ways. From this, we are able to alter the way we live our lives as determined by our energy levels – always searching to heighten our energies.
This may seem like a bold concept, one which you might feel has little purchase but whilst the science behind it can be easily overlooked, the metaphor can prove successful in improving our mental wellbeing. We need to consider our energy levels as something that can be boosted or zapped.
Let’s say that we wake up each day with full energy levels and as a result, we are full to the brim with positive emotions. Something may happen during the course of the morning which leads to your energy levels lowering. For example, you burn your tongue on your morning coffee, your bus is late which means you are late to the office or your kids are having tantrums making it impossible to get them to school. These obstacles, or unfortunate events, mean that we can’t help but feel a little lower than we were before. If it was down to us, surely we would not allow these events to happen at all? However, whether we like it or not, some things we simply can not control.
However, what happens when we acknowledge that other people can influence our energy levels?
This is where the importance of self-love in relationships comes into play.
When we engage in negative interactions, we leave ourself vulnerable to a lower energy. Examples of such interactions include tense conversations with your boss, heated arguments with your partner or judgemental conversations with your friends. These exchanges undoubtedly leave us with a lowered energy level because they give us negative feelings.
Again, this is sometimes unavoidable. However, when engaging in a relationship where this type of interaction is totally avoidable and achieves nothing (which is often the case) then there is one simple answer I want to share with you that I promise will change your life.
Leave the conversation. Leave the environment. Remove yourself from the relationship.
It’s that simple.
I’m not completely naive and I, of course, know that this is easier said than done. However, if you can change your mindset and acknowledge that this is a relationship that no longer enhances your energy levels thus is not worthy of your time, then what follows is a change in your reality.
Your boss is making your job impossible. Look for alternative employment. You may just find that a new, more exciting and fulfilling opportunity is waiting just around the corner.
Your Partner is making life difficult. They contradict you, try to control you and argue with you at every opportunity they get. Over time, your energy levels become so reduced that this new low level of energy is normalised in your every day life. Cut this relationship out of your life. The sooner, the better. Once someone proves that they do not complement your energy, instead diminishing your happiness, then they are no longer a worthwhile entity in your life. You will find that, without this constant negativity, your mind is open to new possibilities; in the workplace, in your personal life, with your family and friends.
Understanding the importance of your own internal energy is important when aiming for self-love. The above examples are extreme cases. Self-love in this form can be exercised in a number of ways. It can be as simple as realising that the man who made a derogatory remark about your appearance in front of your peers was acting inappropriately. Address this. Protect your energy and tell him that what he said wasn’t okay.
Protecting our own energy does not mean stealing it from others. Equally, it does not mean that others can steal energy from you.
Healthy relationships demonstrate a compromising energy exchange. If your partner usually makes a coffee for the two of you in the morning, why don’t you make the drinks tomorrow morning? If your friend drove to the last gig, why don’t you offer next time? This concept is about compromise. Understand how you would like to be treated to protect your own energy and live by this guide when interacting with others.
If one can connect and build up enough energy, then coincidental events begin to happen consistently.James Redfield. The Celestine Prophecy.
By removing toxic relationships and interactions from your everyday life, you will feel refreshed. In the future, you will know what value to place on your own energy and strive to attain relationships where your energy levels are enhanced, not diminished.
Try to be aware each day of your energy and strive for energy enhancing situations! You might just find that this change in outlook provides the key to happiness.